hard to swallow.

We spend the bulk of today at the University of Nebraska Medical Center for two reasons.  Besides having an appointment with a swallowing specialist, Mike had a sore on his neck (in the radiation field) that was not healing and we were concerned enough to want to have it looked at.

This morning we saw Dr. Bill Lydiatt's Physican Assistant, Jennelea Montanez.  She was a familiar face and comforted us with her words something to the effect that she does not believe this is related to cancer.  We tend to think everything is these days. Can you blame us?  She said that Mike's skin is still suffering the effects of the radiation and called this sort of thing "radiation recall".  Technically she called it a musositis, or breakdown of the epidermal surface due to radiation.  We are to continue with the sulfa cream, and we were encouraged to keep Tara's organic moisturizing oils on his poor skin.  She assessed that the skin might have been irritated because it is located at a "bony prominence" at the base of his neck.  We laughed because he does have some bony prominences with his weight loss, but...

We were encouraged that when we did the tradition "weigh in" Mike showed some weight gain! He is up to 166 pounds - but we wanted to add that he is in need of a haircut so it might be closer to 165 - ha.

This afternoon we met with a swallowing specialist and found it very, very helpful.  Mike was encouraged by how many things he had "figured out" on his own - for instance, "adding extra juice, broth, gravy, butter and oil to your foods help it go down".  Not only did she clearly explain why swallowing is so difficult following a bout of radiation but she also gave Mike a series of exercises & stretches to do every day.  I call it "head & neck yoga".  The goal is to tone the swallowing mechanism.  Mike is totally jazzed about this because he is acutely aware of how helpful it will be.

This week Mike started Tony Horton's 10 Minute Workout to prepare himself for more extensive body conditioning at Anytime Fitness.  And today he added his head & neck pilates regime.  I have always admired Mike's discipline.  He is on the way to rebuilding his muscles all over the place.

I have said this before, but spending time around the head & neck oncology center is exhausting. But today we are super thankful for our good news about the "red spot that wasn't getting better".  That was news that wasn't hard to swallow.

somebody is feeling better.

I was going to make a post about how I have noticed in dozens of little ways that I think Mike is finally starting to feel a bit more like himself... in the brightness of his eyes, his energy level, his ability to eat, how long he can eat without tiring, his looks, his mannerisms, his spunk... a myriad of tiny wonderful improvements.

  And on Valentines Day I got some more proof.  I knew that Mike felt guilty (even though I told him a hundred times it didn't matter) that gifts for my last birthday and Christmas were below his normal standards.  My most recent birthday fell on the day before his last radiation treatment. We were both doing good to survive and honestly something like 'celebrate' sounded ridiculous.  The Christmas holiday wiped us both out more than we anticipated.

Anyway, last night Mike surprised me with diamond  earrings for Valentines Day.  And not only that, it was complete with a story AND one of his made-with-love-and-meaning cards!  Proof that the real Mike is making his comeback!

You want more details? Oh, OK... We have a pink heart tucked into our bathroom mirror that says "I love you" in my handwriting on one side and Mike's on the other.  We have flipped it back and forth every day for about six month now.  The paper is almost worn out. The cover of his card had a color copy cut-out of each side - and the inside read: "Everyday is a Valentine's Day with you..." 
The earring story? In 1956, the year of Mike's birth, Mike's dad gave his mom a watch with two diamonds on it.  They later had a ring made for him with these diamonds and a shark's tooth keepsake.  He took the ring to Borsheims to have the diamonds set in earrings for me, but because there were antique and flat, it was more cost effective to get me new, sparkly ones! (They are so colorful and bright!) He also knew I was tired of the chinky hoop earrings that I wear everyday and want to throw away.

He has always been one of the most thoughtful gift givers... and he is back.

157.

I am wondering where we get the idea that it is easy to put on extra pounds.  It seems like an insurmountable task with Michael John Blanc.  I just returned from yet another January trip   - cannot miss the grand baby showers in Dallas!  Mike was already in bed when I got home from the airport since the snow storm required a 45 mph pace.  But this morning I stated "I think you are putting on some weight" which proved to be wishful thinking when Mike told me he weighed 157 when he stepped on a scale at work yesterday.  From my calculations, this is a record low.  Except when he was in high school.  But he does feel good, for which we are very, very thankful.

He's doing the work (to eat) but he is also doing the work. ha.  Mike might be skinny for a while.

I put on some weight this month with all my traveling, for what that is worth.

blood work back.

We are thankful to report that Mike's blood work came back "clean".  The only thing they noticed was a Vitamin D deficiency.   Makes the upcoming trip to Florida seem like "doctor's orders".  Love it.

I need to wait patiently with a thankful heart for God's timing for strength and vibrant health for Mike.

update... and 165.

Thought I would check in with our blue-band riders...  Radiation side effects continue to take their toll.  We replay Dr. Haughey's reassuring words about the absence of anything-cancer in our minds as Mike still struggles to eat and put on weight.  We agreed that he should check in with our local physician again to see if "Dr. Karen's" assessment that Mike is malnourished and possibly anemic is correct.  Mike saw Dr. Tracie Martin on Friday and had blood work done on Saturday. We are still awaiting the results.  But we did find out that Mike weighed one pound less than he did the last time he saw Dr. Martin, which was two weeks after he completed his radiation treatments.  (If you remember, the radiation side effects kicked into high gear 2-3 weeks after the radiation was completed.  This was when Mike had trouble eating anything at all and he started on a "survival mode" diet.  This consisted of 4 Orgain protein drinks per day and 2000 ml of water, and this sustained Mike for about three weeks.)

We are learning that when your weight loss eats into your fat reserves and your muscles, it takes a long time to rebuild and restore your strength and weight.  It is one thing when someone tells you that it will take a while to rebuild... but it really seems like a long time when you are in it waiting for the weight to come back.

We are very thankful to have a trip this weekend to refresh and rejuvenate.  My wonderful company schedules their leadership training in exotic places and I am heading to the Disney Yacht & Beach Club at Walt Disney World in Orlando on Wednesday, and Mike will join me on Friday.  We have met some of our dearest couple friends from around the country at CM events.  We are especially excited to spend time with Nile & Leigh Ernst from Carlsbad, CA this weekend.  Nile weathered an intense cancer battle himself two years before Mike's journey. When I asked Mike what he wanted to do to celebrate the completion of radiation treatments, he said 'spend time with Nile.'  When Leigh and I are soaking up some excellent training on how to help people manage with photo loads, Mike and Nile will be soaking up the sun by the pool!  Then the four of us are spending all day Sunday park-hopping the Disney theme parks like kids.  We are calling it an old-fashion double date! 

It was 3 days before the 2011 CM Leadership training in Cancun last year that we found out about Mike's cancer on February 4th.  I was highly distracted by that sobering news last year.  I am hoping to be distracted by fun this year.  Again, thank you for your continued prayers.

the journey.

After we returned home to the Vespa's from Barnes Hospital on Tuesday night, Prosecco in hand around the fireplace, I asked "Janice, where are we on the journey now???"  Janice has been ready with great word pictures along MikesLongRide to both prepare and amuse us with what lays ahead.  Right before Mike's first big surgery she said "that we were perched on the edge of the grand canyon ready to head down into some rough terrain".  When radiation came on the radar she cleverly stated "that the coastline was in sight but the path turned us back for much more riding."

I was eager to hear where we were now!  After a thoughtful pause Janice said "I think Mike is walking his bike - like pushing it - because the bike is rickety and beat up.  The front wheel is bent.  Mike is maneuvering the weathered bicycle up the steps... because he is home.  And he is in the market for a new bike."

Well said, my friend.

good emotions.

When we returned home on Wednesday night I ran to The Little House to tie up some loose ends before Emily arrived home for the holidays the next morning.  I popped in my new Amy Grant "A Christmas to Remember" CD and busied myself... until Gabriel's Oboe came on.  If you have seen the movie The Mission, you know this moving instrumental... I stood in the kitchen and wept.  Good tears.  Deep tears.  Good emotions moving out and Up... Amen.

(If you don't want a scene, it would be best to keep me out of the public eye while Highland Cathedral or Gabriel's Oboe are playing.)

another finishing line.

When we left Dr. Haughey's office on Tuesday afternoon it felt different.  We left lighter... overwhelmed with praise and thanksgiving... also numb... and everything felt a little different.

On Wednesday morning we headed back to the Siteman Cancer Center, 3rd Floor Radiology, for a CT chest scan.  Only this was a happy scan.  A scan that will be our baseline for Dr. Haughey's watchful eye over the coming years.   They do not expect anything to show up on the scan - and we certainly pray that nothing like another cancer cell ever shows up again, but continued care involves a yearly CT scan of the chest.  Dr. H will not scan Mike's head and neck routinely because he can see and feel everything he needs to with a scope of his neck and physical examination of his neck.

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow.

"squeaky clean" report!

After Dr. Haughey examined and scoped Mike and then stated "Everything is 100%. There is nothing that I am concerned about" - you cannot imagine the rush of relief that swept over us.   I think that the news seemed even bigger and sweeter because I had no idea that Dr. Haughey would be telling us today that - and I quote - "your treatment is completed."  I know that he actually used the words "squeaky clean" when conveying the report.

I have stated that I felt starved for his watchful eye and comprehensive care.  After an examination of the exterior tissues on Mike's neck, Dr. H said that Mike's tissues are getting supple, the way you want them to become. (He mentioned that sometimes after that kind of damage the tissues can get hard.) This was the first good thing.

Then he put the mini-lighted scope down the back of his throat through his nasal passage to view and access the interior tissues.  After expressing the situation in medical terms to Nurse Nicole at the computer, he then told us that everything was 100%.   Any side effects were the result of radiation - and NOT cancer.  You wanted to ask him to say it again and again!  He said there was still some slight swelling on the left side, which was to be expected and which is why Mike still has considerable pain.  He explained how radiated tissues are susceptible to trauma, even chewing.  Even this was spoken in a 'everything looks great' tone.

Our next step is to get a chest CT scan in the morning as our "baseline".  It is standard protocol to have all their patients get one because it is something that they will check every year.  While they rarely see any future cancer outbreaks for Mike's type & kind of cancer, this would be the typical place for it to go - so that is where they will be watching.

Then we made an appointment to see Dr. Haughey in four months.  We made it for April 3, 2012 which would be just two days short of the anniversary of our first surgery. 

The amazing, thrilling, hard-to-even-process thing is that OUR CANCER TREATMENT IS COMPLETED.  Thanks be to God.

dr. haughey.

We have an appointment with Dr. Bruce Haughey in St. Louis tomorrow afternoon, Tuesday, December 20th.  He wanted to see us again eight weeks after Mike completed his radiation treatments.  To say we are eager to have Dr. H check Mike over after our gruelling radiation warfare would be an understatement.  Dr. Haughey provides  very comprehensive care and I am very eager to him to view Mike's throat which continues to be very painful.  I am very excited for him to lay his medical expertise over our case again.

Did I mention that I am eager for Mike to see Dr. Haughey??

159... and holding.

Many of you have asked for regular updates... and sometimes it helps me to just "say some things".   Mike has not been able to turn a corner and put on any weight yet which has been hard.   And if you asked me, it seems like he is continuing to shed pounds.

Let me give you a picture of why this is happening by telling you about his day yesterday:  He got up at 4am to do chores and participate in a study at work (ie very physical labor.)  After meeting Mollie for breakfast at Memories Cafe he spent the entire afternoon chopping firewood with Scotty Gatewood.  Then he did afternoon chores at work (it is his chore weekend) and got home at 8:30pm.  Since he still has pain in swallowing, his 1500 calorie diet cannot keep up with the 8000 calories he expended!  The good part is that he feels good enough to do all of this.

After waking up in the night to worry about it, I decided that my best plan of action is to PRAY his weight back on... while making sure there is lots of good & healthy food in front of him to eat.  I would love to have you PRAY for his rebuilding and strengthening with me.

There.  I feel better.

handy.

We found a practical advantage to Mike's massive weight loss:  Easier access through the tiny hole in the wall for insulating the exterior closet walls.  Yes, Mike crawled in and out of that tiny hole for 8 hours yesterday to complete his insulation project on the new house.  (For more details see http://www.ourbighouseontheprairie.blogspot.com/)

Such an arduous, labor intensive project probably inhibited any weight gain over the weekend, but it did result in a big weight off his shoulders for completing this project!